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The New “Walk Of Shame”

By: Lou Goldhaber, Co-Founder, www.sunnybump.com


It’s one of those things that everyone has done before. Whether or not we admit it out in the open, we have all had that crazy night out where we end up walking home delirious, tired, and embarrassed. Of course I am referring to the infamous “Walk of Shame”. We all know it well. We have all been there before. Some more than others.


When I got older, married, and had a child, I thought my days of partaking in the “walk of shame” were over. I figured I had moved on, graduated, matured. WRONG! I realize that all I really did was trade in one walk for another one. Both of these walks are filled full of shame, embarrassment, uncomfortable surroundings, and inappropriate attire. Yes…all you parents out there know exactly what I am talking about. We may have traded in our late night drinking adventures for bottle feedings, but we still have the good ol’ walk of shame.


The other night I went out to dinner with a big group of people. It was special night out. It was for a special occasion, and it was filled with friends, laughter, and good food. I decided for whatever reason to bring my 4 month old son Ray to this event. He is usually very good when we go out

(a total mench) and I wanted him to meet some of these people he hadn’t met before. The night got off to a great start. Ray was happy… the food was flowing… the vibe was right. I started to look at my watch and realized it was getting way passed Ray’s bedtime. We all know that feeling. Immediate thoughts of terror started creeping into my mind. What if he has a meltdown? Well, my thoughts became reality. By the time the main courses came out and Ray was now 2 hours past his bedtime, he started to meltdown. I can’t blame the little guy. Schedules people schedules! I usually rule the schedule with an iron fist. But not this night, and I paid for it.


Ray began to freak out. Nothing I could do would console him. I began to try all my tricks. Bobbing, weaving, ducking, sshing, covering. You name it I tried it. Nothing worked. I looked around the table at all the faces thinking that they wanted to kill me. Thoughts of them asking, “Why would he bring the baby to dinner?” “I wish that baby would stop crying.” “I am trying to enjoy my meal here.” I began to panic. The sweat was building, the levels of uncomfort were increasing, and I was out of options. So, I grabbed Ray in my arms and did what I thought I hadn’t done since 2001 in Acapulco, MX…that’s right…the “walk of shame”. This walk of shame turned out not to be that different than the one I am used to from my past. I proceeded to get up and walk by everyone in my group as I exited the table and the restaurant with my crying baby.


Let’s examine the similarities.


1) Embarassment:

Old Walk- Utter Embarrassment. “Look at this idiot walking home at 5AM in the morning.”

New Walk- Utter Embarrassment. “Man, that baby is really crying, and I want to strangle that guy.”


2) Inappropriate Attire:

Old Walk- “Why is that guy walking home at 5AM in a full suit?”

New Walk- “Why is that guy walking through the restaurant with a burp cloth over his shoulder?”


3) Exhaustion:

Old Walk- “Man, I shouldn’t have had that much to drink last night. It’s gonna be a long day.”

New Walk- “Man, I hope this baby sleeps through the night tonight ‘cause I am exhausted.”


It ended up not really being that big of a deal at all. I returned to the table after settling him down outside to everyone’s excitement. They all wanted to know where I went and why. Everyone at the dinner was super understanding. They are all parents, and they understood that sometimes babies cry. It turned out to all be in my head. This was a huge relief and a good life lesson. In the end, things are probably never really as bad as they seem. I guess this walk of shame was better than the ones in my past.

 

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3 Ways to Save on Kids’ Clothes! by ThredUp

By: By Carly Fauth, Chief Mom at thredUP.com

 It’s no secret that kids grow fast!  Every time I turn around, I feel like my son’s pants are suddenly too short and his shirts are fitting a little bit too much like spandex.  And don’t even get me started on the rips and tears on the knees of his jeans.  Why is it that boys love to throw their bodies on the ground?  But, I digress!  Bottom line is, it’s a never-ending cycle and I feel like I’m always adding to or replacing something in his wardrobe.  It’s expensive and to be honest, a major budget buster!  But, I’ve quickly learned a few tricks of the trade for saving money on my son’s clothing and I’m very excited to have the chance to share them with you!

Extend the life of the clothing you already own!  Skirt too short?  Add a ruffle.  Rips and tears in the knees of your son’s jeans?  Sew on a cool monsterknee patch. T- shirts too small?  Double them up to make 1 shirt that fits.  There are a ton of ways you can re-purpose your kids clothing to make it in to something that’s wearable again.

Buy Big.  I always try to buy my son’s shirts and jackets 1 size larger than his current size so he can wear them longer.  I certainly don’t like things swimming on him, but rolling the sleeves and layering under a jacket usually keeps him looking neat in slightly big clothing.  The only thing that doesn’t really work for this idea is pants because if the waist size is too big, there isn’t much you can do to make them fit (using a belt only makes them “bunchy” at the top).

Consignment!  I’ll be honest, before I had my son, I was not really in to the whole “used clothing” thing.  But, once I saw how much money I could save by purchasing items that were “gently worn” as opposed to brand new, I was hooked!  And the best part is, there are companies out there, like thredUP.com, who allow you to shop consignment from the comfort of your own home.  And don’t think you have to sacrifice style!  To prove it, I’ve put together a collection of my favorite thredUP spring/summer “must have” items and the best part is, they are all under $10!  KIDS SPRING/SUMMER STYLE FOR LESS

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The End Of An Era

By: Lou Goldhaber, Co-Founder & Daddy - www.sunnybump.com

 

With anything in life, all good things must come to an end. Seinfeld eventually had to come off the air, Milli Vanilli was eventually exposed for the fraud that they were, and they finally stopped making Shrek movies. Bummer! Times change, people change, and circumstances change. I recently have found this to be especially true when it comes to parenting. Just when you think you got things figured out…just when you think you are in a good groove…just when you’re about to say… “Man, this isn’t so bad”. BOOM! You get smacked right in the face with a dose of reality.

This past week, when we were visiting our family in MI, our little guy started to do some pretty amazing stuff. We had been encouraging him to start to try to roll over since he is starting to develop a mean case of male pattern baldness from lying on his head. To our surprise and pure jubilation…he did it! One by one, he started to do each step slowly but surely. First was a little side-side rock (like a drunken sailor), then came the half-roll, and then all of a sudden…flip… like a flapjack. We were pumped! We were so excited by this milestone that we didn’t really pause to think of the consequences of what came with that newfound athletic ability. I have now come to learn, like more experienced parents already know, that with each and every milestone, comes new setbacks and challenges.

After returning to Chicago, we were excited to share this new development with our pediatrician. At our most recent check-up, we told them about the new move he has added to his repertoire. After informing them, we were instructed by our pediatrician that we were no longer allowed to swaddle him at night. Since he was rolling over, it was a risk to have him in a position he couldn’t get out of if he rolled onto his face. Wait…did she just say that we can’t swaddle him at night? That is like telling Popeye he can’t eat spinach or Angelina Jolie that she can’t adopt more children. I mean c’mon….seriously….NO SWADDLING?

Like many other families I know, swaddling has become the backbone of successful night sleeps in the household. Now, normally I wouldn’t be too upset by this development. I actually hate the act of swaddling! I mostly hate it because I suck at it. No matter what I do, he always seems to sneak an arm out. But, since he was 3-months old he has slept through the night with no issues. Man…this is truly unchartered territory.

So, this past week, the proverbial “gloves” were taken off, and we began to experiment with the “no-swaddle” sleep. I will preface to everyone reading this post that I believe I have one of the most active 4-month babies ever. While I am obviously very biased, this kid just doesn’t sit still at all. Typically, the swaddling keeps the little guy from his normal routine of controlled madness! My little kid likes to move his arms and legs so much that is almost appears as if he is running…besides the fact that his feet aren’t actually on the ground.

So…the experiment began. NIGHTMARE! Here is how it all went down. Night 1: Excessive movement, extreme jostling, fists of fury. Night 2: Lots of waking up, shadow boxing with himself, karate chops and kicks, frustrated parents, lots of coffee. Night 3: Additional rounds of boxing, extreme irritability, circles under eyes, questioning decision making. Night 4: ARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH.

I had heard rumors of the 4-month regression before, but now I was truly living it. I had heard that once you stopped swaddling it was back to the basics and sleep training all over again. As with all good things, this is truly an end of an era. An era when mummifying your child is acceptable and welcomed.  An era when parents rejoiced with sleep filled nights and happy babies. But with every new obstacle comes new challenges to meet and overcome. I am sure that by the time he is 6 months old I will look back on this set-back as just another blip on the radar.


But, this week I have learned a very valuable lesson. Stay in the moment and enjoy each and every stage. I don’t plan to rush to get to the next stage so fast next time, and I will try to enjoy each stage as I enter it.  See ya, swaddle…it was fun while it lasted!

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Do I Need Professional Help?

By: Lou Goldhaber, Co-Founder, SunnyBump.com

 

Hey all you SunnyBlog readers out there. Happy regular egg or happy chocolate egg…aka happy Passover or Easter. I’mmmmmmmm baaaaaack! I know, it has only been a few weeks, but, man does time fly when crap is happening. I apologize for my absence! Since we last chatted, lots has been going down in Chicago. I recently became an Uncle for the 4th time due to a new beautiful baby girl newly added to the family (welcome baby P), my son is now almost 4-months old and running things in my house (nothing new there), and SunnyBump is taking off. All seems right in the world.

However, recently I have been suffering from a slight mental condition that I have been struggling to cope with that I wanted to share with all my loyal readers out there. Perhaps there are parents out there who know this condition well and can share in my utter confusion. This condition has come on quite recently, and I am struggling to deal with its symptoms. Apparently, this condition is known in the medical world as  “phantom crying”. I know…sounds made up or like something that belongs in the psych ward, but apparently this is a real medical phenomenon, and people like me suffer from this condition all over the planet. Let me explain further.

This past week, my wife and son took a roadtrip to her hometown of Detroit. Shout-out to motown. I was very sad to see them go. Even though it is very nice to have a few nights to myself, my son is changing so fast that even a few days apart from him can result in me missing a lot of cool changes. This past week, with them gone, I went to bed super excited about sleeping through the night. I went to bed at my normal time of 10:30PM or so (no jokes please…I know it’s lame…but cut me some slack). I went to sleep with full confidence that my body would recognize this opportunity and capitalize by sleeping through the night. WRONG! At around 3AM…I heard it. What? Heard what? I heard “the cries.” I immediately woke up. “Are they back?” “Did they return from MI?” How could I be hearing cries in the middle of the night? “Am I delusional?” “Do I need to seek professional help?” “Is all the stress of life and work getting to me?” “Did I crack?” “How can I be hearing him if he is 300 miles away?”

Despite some obvious differences in this analogy…hearing strange sounds in the middle of the night kind of makes me feel like Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost. See picture below.

image


Apparently “Phantom Crying”, as it is referred to, is not a new thing by any stretch of the imagination. So, I decided to do some additional digging on this phenomenon to determine what is going on here. According to some articles I read, this is typically a women’s issue…with mothers being the main group suffering from this condition. Expert Alison Astair, a behavioral specialist who works with both parents and children, says these mind tricks are a maternal thing. “When our hearing is incapacitated we feel a lack of control, which will prompt every mom to worry.” But wait, I am not a mom…I am a dad! Now I am really confused. According to the rest of this article, this all comes from a keen sense of Mother’s intuition. Mother’s Intuition? But I am a guy….ARRRRGGGGHHHH! This expert believes that women are programmed through evolution to care for their young, and that we maximize all of our senses to do so….even if it means hearing things that don’t exist. Hmmm….sounds pretty scientific to me.

I kept reading the article only to find the real question I was seeking. “Why don’t most men hear phantom cries?” Her response seemed logical as she explained, “Mens’ mental state, in terms of the family, is often more financial. Yep, think hunter-gatherer. The moms have been the assumed nurturers since the dawn of time. Women often complain that their husbands don’t wake up in the middle of the night when the baby cries,” says Astair. “For men, this is a non-developed skill, though it can be learned.”

I get it now…basically what she is trying to say is between work, sports, the TV, and all the other crap men like me love, the crying in the middle of the night kinda gets lost in the shuffle. Hmmm…so what does that mean for me if I am hearing phantom cries? Well…this either means one of two things. 1) I am crazy and need to seek professional help…or  2) I am a super sensitive guy who deserves mad credit from his wife about being emotional checked-in, in the present, and sensitive! The perfect husband. I am going to go with option 2. I think I have become all the things she always wanted me to be. Who knew all you had to do was hear cries in the middle night to confirm all the stuff I tell her all the time. I have always told my wife that I am in touch with my sensitive side. Man, it feels good to be right for a change.

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“That Outfit Is Tacky”

By: Lou Goldhaber, Co-Founder- SunnyBump

Happy Monday, everyone! Seems like I am on a nice routine of having good blog material every Monday morning. Each weekend seems to be providing more comedic relief than the next. Maybe this means my life is really boring during the week, or maybe it means the more time I spend at home with the family the more comedy seems to arise. Either way…I still hope you are enjoying these fun and truthful encounters.


This weekend proved to be no exception to this new rule. After a long and productive week in the office, I was excited for what the weekend might bring. I had been thinking about the weekend all throughout the week. Saturday was going to be a big test for me as a daddy. My wife, who is now back to work after a 3 month stretch, had two new client meetings on Sat afternoon. I was tasked with watching Ray from about 1-6 on Saturday afternoon all by myself. I was all geared up for the challenge and volunteered when my wife asked me If I was up for it. I figured I needed to take it up another notch after my successful endeavours the weekend before. At first, I thought about who I could invite over to “visit”…aka…provide another set of hands, but I decided to see if I could give it a-go all by myself. I have done all the tasks myself before (feeding, changing, napping, etc.)…but I have never done them all by myself over a 5-hour period.

I know this sounds strange. You are probably asking yourself…how could a dad of over 3 months have such little one-on-one time with his baby? The answer is simple. By the time I get home each night, the little man is ready for bed. My wife is usually home and we put him to bed together. On a typical weekend, we try to spend as much time together as a family as we can. So typically, we are all home and fall into our typical routines. This weekend was going to be a tad different than the norm.

Friday night was pretty relaxed. I was getting geared up for the big day. Saturday morning arrived and the time was slowly ticking down. I was getting ready for my wife to say goodbye and let me ride solo. Eventually the time came. My wife said goodbye and I heard the door close behind her. I was on my own. OH BABY! I looked at the little man and saw this look on his face that might have well just said…you poor bastard, you have no idea what you are in for. I had been prepped on the daily activity, and I was hell bent on keeping to it.

The first task up was feeding him. Typically he eats about 4-5 ounces on his mid-morning feeding. So in typical fashion,  I started with a bottle of 3oz. Before I could even get the bottle in his mouth…ERUPTION! Poop #1. Oh man….this was a major deviation from the plan. No worries, just a slight detour. I dealt with it…changed him…and was back to feeding before you could say…WHAT….ERUPTION #2. You’ve gotta be kidding me! Is this some kind of joke? I feel like the little guy was talking with mommy in the AM and devised a plan to give me a true run for my money.  Finally, I got him changed again and he was ready to attack the 3 oz. He downed the 3 oz. with no issues whatsoever. So, I thought I would get another 2 oz. bottle ready…he crushed it. 5 oz. in now. Hmmm…this is a tad abnormal. 6oz. 7oz. 8oz. HOLY COW THIS KID WON’T STOP EATING. I finally had to cut him off…it was like shutting down the midnight buffet on a cruise ship.

I finished getting him all settled and put him down for a nap. Finally my wife came home. I was thrilled to make it through the day unscaved…another achievement. I was pretty excited about everything that night. We went to bed and I was proud that I had survived the day solo. However, everything was about to go up another notch.

That night…at 3AM…We got the call! My brother-in-law and sister-in-law called, and said they thought she might be going into labor, and they needed someone to come over and watch their kids.  My wife turned to me and said, “which task do you want? You can stay at home with Ray…solo…or take care of their kids?” I thought to myself…oh man…this is like choosing between chop liver and brussel sprouts. I had just gotten through the 5-hour test run the day before. This was like little league compared to what was coming up. I chose to stay home and take care of Ray. My wife got up and went over to their house to take care of their kids. She is much more skilled than me.

So here we go…round 2. I woke up by myself, with Ray, and was completely nervous about the day. I had to do everything this time. Feed him, pick out his outfit, dress him, give him his meds, and make sure he was happy. WHOA!

I started the morning routine. However, I found myself on Facetime every few minutes asking my wife all kinds of questions. What outfit should he wear? What time do you think I should put him down for the nap? Her response was pretty simple. “Why don’t you just get him together and come on over to the house?” Needless to say I was a little overwhelmed. The thought of combining the teams was a great idea, but how was I going to get him over to their house? She had taken the car that morning and I was already feeling a little intimidated. I couldn’t even figure out how to find a moment to brush my teeth let alone get him over to their house. But then I just had a moment where I said to myself…screw it…I can do this.

I put an outfit together, got him in his car seat, brushed my teeth, packed up the diaper bag, went outside onto the street, found a cab, got him in the cab strapped down, and made it over to their house. I DID IT! I walked into the house, and everyone was surprised and shocked to see me. Everyone was very proud of me, my wife and their 2 sons included. The oldest boy, their 7 year old son, congratulated me on getting over to the house successfully. He, then, said one of the funniest things that truly put my skills into perspective. He turned to me and said, “Uncle Lou, nice job, but that outfit you picked out is really tacky!” I mean seriously? I am now getting called out by a 7-year old. In all fairness to him, he probably has as much experience as I do and the orange bib I picked to go with his outfit was not only on backwards, but really didn’t go with the rest of his decor. Oh well…can’t teach an old dog all new tricks.

In the end, it turned out to be a false alarm, and we did not have a new cousin to welcome in that night. But, I am now anxiously awaiting round 3. This turned out to be great practice for having to do it all over again. While the events of this weekend were a real challenge, I learned that sometimes you just need to dive in headfirst….tacky outfit or not!







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“Rumble” - The Rite Of Passage

By: Lou Goldhaber, Co-Founder & Daddy- www.SunnyBump.com

Happy Monday everyone! I hope everyone out there had a nice weekend. It has been almost a week since my last entry. Man…I am really starting to slack off aren’t I? I apologize for my absence. I know, I know…you barely noticed I was gone….well…I missed you all too! Let’s make up and move into the new week.  A lot has happened in the last 7 days. It is truly amazing how much stuff you can cram into the week and especially the weekend. Ray is doing great….growing…changing…gaining an opinion. SunnyBump is also doing really well… also growing…also changing. We are getting tons of new and engaged parents into our universe every single day. It is very exciting.

This weekend was a really nice weekend with the extended family. Friday was a chill night at home with the wife and Ray (nothing blog worthy here), Saturday was a busy day of visiting and nanny interviews. I could spend another entire blog entry on nanny interviewing…but we will skip that one for today. On Sunday, me, Ray, and the wife went out to brunch with my brother-in-law, sister-in-law and our 3-year-old nephew. My brother-in-law and sister-in-law are a tad bit older than my wife and me, but have tons more experience with children. They have 3 beautiful children, and they are expecting one any day now. That’s right….4 kids. These guys are one short of a basketball team. The have become the masters of the “children’s zone defense”. They are used to playing the 2-3 zone and soon will be switching to the 2-4. Thats right…1 parent per 2 kids. Brave souls! My wife and I are still trying to figure out how to make it to brunch with 1 kid without having to start getting ready 3 hours in advance.

We always like spending time with their family as their kids are really great and they always have lots of great tips and tools that my wife and I can try out on our son Ray. Basically, there is no situation that this team hasn’t been through before. To us, they are like the Huxtable family.

The brunch was all going according to plan. Ray was happy, we were all eating, life was good. I was holding Ray and eating at the same time…a new feat for me. This doesn’t sound like a major accomplishment to most, but we haven’t taken Ray out to many meals so this was a skill I still had not yet mastered. I was feeling very proud of myself and then all of a sudden I felt the “rumble”. Oh no! All the parents out there know the “rumble” I am referring to. Ray felt it was a good time to relieve himself right during the meal. I turned to my wife and told her of the development. She, of course having been through this many times on her own, was calm and collected. I, on the other hand, immediately starting going into decision mode. What do I do? Do I continue to eat? Pass him to my wife (hmmm…not sure)? Or do I step up to the challenge? Well…I was feeling super confident after having accomplished eating and holding him at the same time…so…

I turned to my wife and said, “Hand me the diaper bag. I am going to go attempt to change him in the men’s room”. There seemed to be some sparked interest at the table…somewhere between utter shock and excitement about what was about to transpire. I was going in…no turning back. My brother-in-law and sister-in-law seemed to be quite intrigued by this development. To them this is a standard reflex…almost as common as sneezing or breathing. I mean to them…changing a diaper in public restrooms is so common that they probably don’t even pay attention to how many times they have done it or where they are doing it next. They have changed diapers in planes, trains, automobiles, floors, bathrooms, retail stores, upside down, downside up, and everything in between…you name it and they have been there and done that. I am used to watching them take their kids to the bathroom with the greatest of ease. Not me. But….today I was going to give it a shot. I grabbed the Patemm Pad (a great product by the way—-shout out to founder Grace Welch) and headed to the men’s room. The walk to the restroom felt like a long and windy road to a new and exciting adventure. What would await me?

I pushed open the door to find 1 stall and 2 urinals and no changing table. NO CHANGING TABLE… PANIC! Heart rate 120+ BPM. Am I really going to have to do this on the floor? The floor…really? As I started to bend over to set everything up on the ground, I glanced to the right and saw a room that said “handicap”. A handicap bathroom within a bathroom? That was a first. I opened the door and waalaa. A changing station! The diaper gods had aligned. It was clean, working, and ready for action. I proceeded to go through my checklist. Clean diaper…check…wipes…check…garbage can close by…check…happy baby…check. I went through my at-home routine. I started with taking off his clothes. If you didn’t already know, I HATE SNAPS (check previous blog entry). Once that was done I dove into the action. I don’t need to get into specifics on this one, but it was a wild ride. Luckily it was a contained hazard zone and there was no “Uptown blowout.” Phew.

After it was all done, I packed everything up and left the restroom with a clean and still happy baby. I felt so proud. I did it! One step closer to being a fully functioning parent. As I returned down the long hall, I felt so good about returning to the table with a bunch of changing veterans. When I returned they all asked me how it went. I told them all went well and there was nothing to worry about. They all laughed. I’m sure they saw right through me and knew the truth. I was scared shitless…no pun intended. But…deep down I know that I just went through a “rite of passage”.  A step towards parenting nirvana. See ya on the other side!

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The “Circuit”

By: Lou Goldhaber, Co-Founder & Daddy- SunnyBump.com

Happy Monday everyone. Hopefully all my readers and families out there had a wonderful weekend. This past weekend was a very momentous weekend for my family. We were fortunate enough to be invited to our very first birthday party with our son Ray. We were so excited! THIS WAS A BIG DEAL. We awoke Sat morning to give Ray a morning bath before the party, took some time to figure out the perfect outfit, and gave him a tutorial about how he needed to behave. This was a very important discussion with Ray. I explained to him that even though he was only 3 months old, his behavior at the party was crucial in order for us to get a good reputation in the party scene. If he misbehaved, we might not get invites to future parties. I know it sounds crazy, but you don’t want to get a bad reputation on the first time out…ya know? So needless to say, this was a big first outing for us. 


The party was for an adorable baby who was turning 1.  He was a tad bit older than Ray, but I told Ray that it was important to get in good with these older kids.  This wasn’t just any bday party either. This was a great party! It had all the elements one would need in order to have a good time. Good food…check…good people…check…cake…check…balloon guy…check… booze for the parents…double CHECK.

Since we are new parents, and not well versed in the art of time management, we arrived at the party right at the exact time Ray was supposed to feed. Bad start! Ray was a little fussy and began the party with a couple wails and some steady tearing. I thought we were in for a long party. The host was nice enough to let us use their kid’s room to feed the little man.  We took a little pit stop, fueled up the little guy, and back to the party we went, ready to work the room.

As we emerged from the feeding room and started mingling throughout the party, we got to meet lots of other parents with young children. Everyone was incredibly nice and welcoming. It was really cute to see all the babies meet. Ray took to a nice little girl named Clara. She was a younger gal, born 3 days after Ray. This was one of the first times I got to see Ray’s “game” in action. He did pretty well for himself. There was some promise for future flirting down the road. She wasn’t that into him, but I guess he should get used to that for later in life.

This party really had a lot of cool kids. In fact, there might have been as many babies at this party as there were grownups. This party had everything covered. Young babies, older babies, twins, boys, girls. It was a real melting pot and a cool experience.

I think the biggest reason my wife and I were so excited to be invited to this party was that we had realized that we had now entered into a new “circuit” for the first time…the “baby birthday circuit”. I have been in other circuits in my life, the Bar Mitzvah circuit, the college formal circuit, the wedding circuit, the bar mitzvah circuit again as an adult. All have very different characteristics and benefits.

When you’re 13, the Bar Mitzvah circuit is great. You get to stay out late, eat fried food, take cheesy photos in the photo booth, hang out with other kids, and get all hopped up on sugar. In the college formal circuit, you got to pretend to be grownup, have a few cocktails, and stay out to the wee hours of the night. In the wedding circuit, you got to finally experience some good food, you began to appreciate a good cocktail hour, and you enjoyed the live bands and great locations you got to travel to.

Now, I had heard a lot of stories about the “baby birthday circuit” but had never experienced it myself until Saturday. I had heard stories of parents hitting two to three different parties in a given day. WOW! Suburbs, city, suburbs and city… back and forth. This circuit sounded exhausting but incredibly rewarding. I mean you would almost never need to go grocery shopping again. Based on my first experience, these parties seem to have great food and if you have the privilege to get invited to 2-3 of these a day you would never have to cook or make anything on the weekends. JACKPOT!

Needless to say, I am very excited for Ray to continue to make friends and for us to continue to explore the Baby Birthday circuit together. I look forward to putting many miles on the car, calories in my system, and introductions to other parents. Giddy up!

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To Look Like Me, Or Not Like Me, That Is The Question!

By: Lou Goldhaber, Co-Founder- SunnyBump.com

When my wife and I first found out we were pregnant and having a child, I distinctly remember thinking to myself, “what will the little guy look like?” “Will he have curly hair like me? Do you think he will be bald? I wonder whose nose he will have”. Eventually, as birth approached, the intrigue of it all seemed to wear off and we became so focused on the child just being healthy.

Well…that time of concern has come and gone and my wife and I are now back to the vanity that consumed us during pregnancy! Recently, we have been discussing the common question that most new parents ask themselves daily. Who do you think the kid looks like? It’s a simple question, one that has been asked for millions of years by parents all over the world, but it has seemed to dominate a lot of the conversation recently with my friends and family.

I must say it, and I am not seeking sympathy (as I most likely wouldn’t get it)…It’s hard to be a new dad. We serve no biological need, and we don’t have much we can offer our new arrivals except diaper changes, cooking, cleaning, and making sure momma is doing well. We cannot breastfeed, we are not recognizable to them, and we can easily be replaced with the mailman without a blip on the radar. The kid wouldn’t know the difference, I swear. This is why when the kid first arrives you are just hoping….hoping…praying…that he looks like me. You are just hoping for that little something that connects fathers and sons everywhere.

Apparently this phenomenon has been around for thousands of years and is referred to as “paternal-resemblance hypothesis”. Sounds fancy, right? The basic gist here goes as follows, A common bit of parenting folklore holds that babies tend to look more like their fathers than their mothers, a claim with a reasonable evolutionary explanation. Fathers, after all, do not share a mother’s certainty that a baby is theirs, and are more likely to invest whatever resources they have in their own offspring. Human evolution, then, could have favored children that resemble their fathers, at least early on, as a way of confirming paternity.”

Here is the article I was reading if you are more interested in this phenomenon. http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=babies-paternal-resemblance

After reading this article, I TOTALLY get it. As a new dad, I was clamoring for anything that would prove that the little guy was, in fact, mine. I wanted to connect! The problem was also that people have such varying opinions on this question. Some people, as kindly as they could, would say that he looks nothing like me. Bummer…man tears! Others, however, would say he was a dead ringer for his daddy. Yes…man tears of joy!

Well, there was only one way to find out the truth. I called up my mom last week and asked her to provide some empirical evidence of me as a child of the same age (3 Months). Low and behold, the evidence starting trickling in.  I give you…the SunnyBump readers…the evidence.

Pic 1:

Me at 3 Months circa 1980

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Pic 2:

Ray at 3 Months circa 2013

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Now I ask you…To Look Like Me, Or Not Like Me, That Is The Question! If you were to ask me…I would say redemption is at hand.